I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
