she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
