She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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