it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize