I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
