Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
It's official drugs can't kill me
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
