Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
