Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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