Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
