some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
