my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
