fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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