Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
