How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Randomize
