I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
