How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize