By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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