drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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