i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Randomize
