she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
