I don't think brook has ever known best
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize