Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
we made out on top of his cat.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
