Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
