Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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