He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Randomize
