Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
