We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
