butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Randomize
