My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
how can u be prego again
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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