At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I think I sprained my soul last night
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I deserve this hangover.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize