I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
