I just saw a hot homeless man
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
