did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Acid is not a monday night drug
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Randomize
