So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
