Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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