and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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