You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
