I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
