I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
