winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
