Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize
