Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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