I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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