So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
