Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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