If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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