I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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