so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
