fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
