I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
