Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
